Getting Real

Getting real

Before I started my venture online, I used to click links that promise me how to earn online. Not just earn. But earn millions. Naive as I had been, I keep giving them my emails and read every word they promise, that one day I end up like them: doing the things they love while having fun at the same time.

To my dismay, no promise was ever real. I was just lead to click links that either a scam or which I have to pay. Most of these promises turned out as leads to links of courses I have to take in order to get that promise of earning millions.

I have no problem with online courses. They help to a certain degree. What I don’t like is the ‘promise’ of a million. Most of the successful online gurus built their millions and brand for years. Neil Patel for one built his empire for five years. Not in a month, or even a year. But why couldn’t they be real?

As time pass by, I slowly unsubscribe to the sites that offer great promises. I retained in my inbox the ones that helped me along the way to be the best that I can be.

I no longer aim for the millions. I aim for the stars. Earning for the stars means I have to follow my passion, give to others what I can give sans false promises, and do the hard work required for its achievement.

There’s no need for me to follow the steps of others. They may serve as my inspiration as the going gets tough.

Mark Zuckerberg did his own thing. So did Steve Jobs. They innovate. They think outside the box, and perhaps never utter promises to others to help them achieve millions.

What these two great men did was inspire others to be the best that they can be, that one day, they too may make something of themselves that could help millions of people.

No false promises. Only a certain grip on reality.

 

pwnezel

Daily Prompt

Justice or Mercy?

Justice or mercy
Years ago, I had a productive argument with my best friend. She asked me for my preference between justice and mercy. I chose mercy over justice. While she preferred justice over mercy.
 
She then pointed out to me: What would happen if criminals wouldn’t be convicted, instead, they’d be forgiven? That would be a bad case, I conceded with her.
 
In the course of our exchange of views, we arrived at a story of a mother whose son faced a pending punishment due to a robbery case charged against him. The son must deal with the disciplinary action. The mother, however, appealed to the person to whom her son committed the crime. She pleaded that her son would be forgiven. What her son did was unacceptable. But as a mother, she loved him unconditionally and also suffered the way her son did. Thus, she asked that her son might be given a chance for a new life.
 
In this scenario, I told my friend that mercy could work wonders in this son’s life. On the contrary, she insisted that the son must face the punishment due to him that he might learn his lessons well.
 
Could justice save our world? I know that laws are needed and meant to carry justice. When justice is not pushed through, many people would relentlessly commit all kinds of crimes. But then we also need mercy, forgiveness, and love. In some cases, the value of mercy may apply best than pursue justice.
 
All cultures and beliefs have laws to be followed to ensure self-preservation. But then we must not underestimate the power of mercy, and traces of love. As far as I know, love is the only weapon that melts the hardest of hearts and disarms the heavily guarded individual.
So the next time we were to choose between justice and mercy, may we choose the best part.
pwnezel

Kindness Unlimited

Kindness unlimited
Are you kind? I often hear angry people say, “I’ll be kind if you’re kind. But when you’re mean, I’m as mean as you.” Competition it is. This is an attitude of people who wants to be understood than to understand. But I don’t want to judge anyone. Each one has his own story to tell. What I’ll be telling now is my story of kindness and how magnanimous it is.
Kindness is beautiful. I’m unsure whether it is learned or a gift given to someone at birth. I’m glad to have a fair share of it. Perhaps it’s one of my innate qualities. Or, maybe a gift that I could give to anyone who needs it. But, hey! I’m not that kind twenty-four seven. Or else, you’d be talking to a saint. I also have my qualms. Or so it seems I’ve tamed myself that much. Okay, enough about me. Let’s focus on kindness.
According to Mark Twain,

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

Some people refuse to be kind for the reason that, like niceness, it signifies weakness. For them, it’s much better to appear unapproachable than appear kind and be abused. Abuse is another story. A kind person is never abused. He is kind because that is his quality. That is his strength. When someone considers himself as a victim, then that’s the time he is abused. One is kind because one is loving. He couldn’t be unkind because to be kind is his quality.
If kindness is a gift, it’s not given in a perfect shape. It needs to be honed and applied in actual situations. Real situations had been my school to sharpen this skill. For more than a decade I was confronted with a vengeful boss. She wasn’t that bad altogether because she could be nicer to others even on the surface. That’s quite an effort. She’d say nasty words, insults and I even feel she hates me for some reasons she alone knows. At times I feel she wants me to be some kind of a person I refused to become. Seeing that I am just what I am made her dislike me. Office politics made the situation worst.
When I started with that job I was a bit immature. I easily got hurt. So, I started to loathe that boss too. As the years passed there were no smooth seas between us. She openly displayed how much she disliked me, while I stayed in the corner licking my wounds. Until the time came that I started the self-development journey. Then and there I remained kind to her despite the reaction I got. I kept telling myself it wasn’t me for I’ve tried to do my best at work despite her criticisms. It’s her. And she’s that due to her unfulfilling personal life. Professionally, she was a success. Personally, it doesn’t appear to be. So it seems.
Some of the employees wasn’t that genuinely kind to her. They deal with her nicely on the surface yet scorn her at her back. It’s a common reaction everywhere, whether in the workplace or not. It’s a domino effect, one that follows the saying to don’t do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you.
So the situation goes on and on. She seems to be confident showing me that nasty side of her being aware that I couldn’t be unkind in return. Until the time came that I decided to quit. I quit not because she hates me. I quit because I know I owe it to myself.
There were no sentimental reactions when my resignation letter was read. I thanked her on my last day of work but never got a response. Someone advised me to indirectly pour out all my feelings about her in social media. But I refused to. That seemed easy to do since most people do it. I refused the temptation. Surely, I posted something on my wall about my resignation on a more objective and deeper level. A post that neither hurt anyone nor showed me as a victim.
Two months passed, I received the good news that I was to receive an amount from the company, as a recognition for the length of service that I’ve rendered. That was small but huge for me. I sent a message to my former boss thanking her for her generosity. The kindness paid off. She replied to me and wished me a happy Lenten celebration. Three short sentences but meant the world to me. A stone seemed to be lifted off from my heart. I was on cloud nine. At last, things ended well for the both of us.
Whether her words were genuine or not, the fact that she said it made it all worth to be grateful for.
Now let me leave these words with you: Treat others kindly not because that’s how you want to be treated. Treat others kindly, because they need to be reminded that kindness resides in their hearts too.
pwnezel

The Need for Healing

healing-quote-1

Days ago I contemplated on narrowing down my niche to healing. What a coincidence it is to today’s prompt. Let me enumerate the grounds why I want to choose this path:

We are all broken

Each of us carries within our self wounds from the past. We get used to it until we consider these wounds a part of our very self. Left unresolved, these wounds would interfere with our day to day activities. We then start to wonder why things always get messy, why peace is elusive, and why it seems we could not do a thing right.

The world needs healers

It was written that those who can love the greatest are the ones who experienced pain the greatest. For how can one describe a place in its minute details when he has never been there? The same holds true for healing. Healers knew where it hurts, what helps and what doesn’t. They just don’t sympathize, they empathize as well.

The world is broken. Very broken. We could not just stand still and watch pains and hurts unfold before our eyes. We need to do our part. But before we could extend help, we need to help our self first. We need to heal first.

Spread inspiration

Why should I do this? Who cares? I asked these questions unto myself. I am a nobody and no one would care to listen anyway. But hey. There is a point in which the messenger is not as important as the message. The point is authenticity. It’s the message between the lines that matter. It’s the force behind the words that urges each one to push through. May we not be constrained in our own limiting beliefs in doing what we feel we should do. Our message may be simple, yet it may be the only words that a broken soul needs in a particular minute.

I need healing too

I’ve been trying to heal myself for quite a time now. Then it occurs to me that it may be more inspiring if I heal with other wounded souls too. That way, I would not be alone in this journey.

So, if you’re like me, I invite you to ride along. Together, in our small way, let us be tenacious in “healing the world and making it a better place.” 

pwnezel

Heal

Tenacious

 

The Importance of Finding Your Individuality

There is nothing more comforting than when you are connected with others. This connection makes you more secure, more accepted and gives you a sense of belongingness. However, this connectedness must not limit you to your individuality.

At some point in your life, you need to distance your beloved self from others in order to see the bigger things that are specifically designed for you. Because when you’re going with the flow all too often, you sometimes get lost in the crowd. You are one with it, yet not quite feeling in it.  While going with the flow offers less resistance, going against it creates friction and discord in your perceived outcomes. But, should you continue the road to least resistance even when you’re not designed to fit in that arena?

Choosing to follow your own individuality might be daunting, but before giving up, consider the following importance of conquering such lofty task.

Carving your own path

The path to individuality is yours to take. NO one could live it for you. Jacob Sokol in his ebook, Living on Purpose, points out that creating your own path is like paving your way in a jungle. You don’t know what’s ahead. You just have to cut your way through dense undergrowth and face whatever you find along the way. You have to have a remarkable amount of grit in order to do this.

Following the path that others may have carved may be helpful, like choosing to have a mentor in a specific field you want to master and in which you feel you’re called to do. But doing the actual thing is your own battle. It’s the same way as learning to walk while a small child. Your parents were there to assist you and catch you when you fall, but the strength needed to stand and take a step is yours alone to muster.

Letting your individuality shine

Oscar Wilde said, “Society exists only as a mental concept; in the real world there are only individuals.”

In the society as a whole, where can we find you? You don’t need to be famous and do great things in order to be recognized. When you become the person you truly are, your light shines no matter how small you may be. No small spark left unnoticed. So, shine on. Be you.

Developing your originality

You’re living in a world of copycats. I, for one, am guilty of this at some point. There was one time when I fell in love with the phrase “to the moon and back“. I first read it at a blogger’s bio. I thought of copying that. However, when I was still fabricating words where I could fill that in, it became an instant cliché. I kept seeing it used on Facebook, Instagram and even on TV promotions.

The creator of that phrase might have been proud. People loved it so much that they keep using it. This might be the one downside of living in the world of copycats. When what you produce becomes an instant hit, people would get confused about its origin.

But you won’t be stopped by this limitation, would you? No matter what, stay original. You may imitate the strategy of others, but not their works. Each one of us has our own genius. Find that genius in you. When you find it, you find the key to your originality chest.

 

 

Contributing your gifts to the world

When you find your own inner genius, and act on it, then you are contributing something to the world. Your contribution might be as small as finding your passion in gardening, or crocheting, or kayaking. No one might enjoy the activity as much as you, but what you become as a result of finding this true love is helpful to others. The beautiful person you could become is what the world needs. The world needs happy people, positive people, and inspiring people.

Not only that, you are also able to share with others the tips and tricks you learn along the way. Isn’t that cool?

Inspiring others

Most of us are dreamers. The difference lies between continuing to just dream and doing something to chase the dream. When you’re able to chase your dream and fulfill it, others would be inspired to do the same. They’d find themselves more confident to get out of the pack and be their true, authentic selves.

Are you ready to spread inspiration? Please do. I might benefit from you in time, I know. All the things above are what I keep saying to myself too. I’m not there yet. And maybe there’s no final destination to the road of individuality. As long as we are given the opportunity to become who we truly are, we need to seize every moment of it.

May you find your own individuality.

pwnezel

Daily Prompt

 

 

How to Live Beyond the Ordinary

Living beyond the ordinary

I read somewhere of someone asking how to make her life extraordinary. Is your life ordinary? Mine too. The good thing with life is we are all born ordinary. Yes, others may have been born with a silver spoon in their mouth, but that does not make them extraordinary. Outwardly, perhaps. They live in huge abode than anybody else, do not need to clean their toilet like anybody else, and even have bodyguards and assistants who are always attentive to their every need.

Still, those things do not make someone extraordinary. Being extraordinary is an inward thing. It is a journey. It is a choice. Media may have its definition about being extraordinary by the way some things or people present themselves. That is why many aspire to be great, famous and wealthy in order to become extraordinary. Worse, they do all means whether acceptable or not just to get there. And we are all amazed at how they managed to climb on the pedestal they are currently standing on. However, when some things got out of hand, we then become shocked upon learning that someone with their standing committed suicide, or got divorced.

Having the same feelings and emotions is what makes us ordinary just like anybody else. What makes us extraordinary is the way we handle ourselves, our strengths, our weaknesses, our gifts, our pains, our life questions.

How then can we become extraordinary? I got the following hints from ordinary people trying to lead extraordinary lives. Together let’s walk through the pathway of their experience.

Be the best version of yourself

When we are in a difficult situation we tend to forget our better self. Most often we associate our self with the situation. When the situation is unfavorable, we also believe we are unlucky or just plain stupid. Being the best version of our self does not mean we are perfect. It means we are the best in our imperfections. It is to maintain grace in the presence of pressure.

It also does not mean we have to be somebody we are not. It’s normal that we admire some people. They only serve as an inspiration but not paintings to be imitated stroke by stroke. Thus, we need to discover our strengths. From there we follow the blueprints within us that make us great just as we are.

Be nice with others

Be nice to yourself first. You could not give what you lack. From there extend that niceness to the people around you. Most people shrink when they are expected to be nice. All because being nice is wrongly linked with being weak. They do not know that it requires great strength to be truly nice. As Richard Dawson said, “Be nice to each other. You can make a whole day a different day for everybody.”

Follow your passion

J.K. Rowling became the first billion-dollar author by following her passion. Passion is a flame that ignites our very being every time it is expressed. Whether our passion is as simple as gardening, nothing can compare the ecstasy we feel every time we see literally the fruit of our labor.

Look for beauty

Beauty is everywhere. It can be the smile of a child, the grace of old age, a flower in bloom, or simply looking within. Beauty presents itself effortlessly when it is sought by an unclouded mind. It is easier to find beauty by freeing our minds from our conditioned thoughts.

Practice random acts of kindness

When you show kindness to others the one who benefits more from it is our self. Take that from me. The sunny feeling of having been kind lasts a lot longer. And it brings a lightness inside for having shared a part of yourself with others.

Build people up

It is easier to tear people down than by building them up. That is why this is so challenging for most of us to do. If we want to be remembered or leave a lasting legacy, we have to muster all our strength to build up others.

Be surrounded by extraordinary people

In one of my unlucky days, I asked myself why had I been so stupid in my judgments. It then dawned on me that I had been surrounded with people of mediocre thinking. They’re nice, they have dreams but they’re not the type who’ll do anything to chase their dreams. Hence, I exited myself from their presence. We may not be physically surrounded by extraordinary people, but their works are much accessible through the internet. Also, we can join organizations online that draw out the best in us.

Be present

The present is inevitable. We could not change the weather, our culture or other people. We have to accept whatever the present puts in our table. The present is just the way it is. If there is something we don’t like in the present moment, we have to accept it, then tweak something that would promise us a favorable future.

Be the hero of your own story 

Each of us has our own dragon. We may either slay it or tame it to our advantage. The surest way is to slay the thoughts that would bring the villain in us. Heroes too never give up that easily. Whether in victory or captivity, we can be heroes when we maintain that tenacity within. Heroes are powerful. That power lies within. And when that power is brought into the open, others would benefit from our hero journey.

Serve God

Heroes do not serve themselves. They serve Someone up there greater than themselves. And when they do it rightfully their power is increased.

Let us then serve God even if others do not. Remember, we might be the only gospel that others ever read.

Are you now ready to live the extraordinary life? Me too!

pwnezel

Daily Prompt