I do not like arguments. Not because I am afraid to be proven wrong; but because to be proven right leaves a heavy burden on my shoulders. In arguments the persons involved only have one goal: to prove they are right. And when proven wrong they walk out angry and guilty; thinking to themselves they lose face. All because, most often than not, people reason out of emotions and not out of logical thinking. What they have in mind is, how others see them, how their “reputation” would look like the moment they would be proven wrong. To the point that they would twist the truth and fabricate stories just to get out of the mess clean.
The other thing is, if in an argument you win, the other person would find ways to bring you down. Such person has not found the secret yet: that a person with high self-esteem does not need to have a clean reputation before others; he needs only to know that his value relies fully on who he truly is, and how he is loved unconditionally by the Source of love. People may destroy reputation, but not the spirit of a strong person.
There are many suggestions out there as to how to win in an argument. But then, I believe, it is more important to learn to get away from this kind of trouble than to learn how to master it when it comes. Thus, let me share with you some Bible verses that inspire us to stay sober in all circumstances:
Agreed by your thoughts. Arguments are not at all wanted or desired by anyone, but still we all do it…
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are right. We hope we would learn the value of temperance along our journey. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think it’s good to ask what is the point? before engaging in argument. We like to call it “intellectual debate” sometimes, but that’s just for our egos. What is to be gained? It is rare we are able to change anyone’s mind, so we end up with hurt feelings and bruised relationships for no benefit whatsoever. We delude ourselves that we possess the oratory or written skills to create a change; far better to nurture a friendship with kindness and understanding than to jump up to announce that someone is wrong. (Of course I need to keep working on this myself!)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great point Paula! Keeping our temperament always in check is part of everyone’s growth process. The more we become kind to our self, the more we become kind to others. Thank you for the insightful comment. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
I do not like arguments. Not because I am afraid to be proven wrong; but because to be proven right leaves a heavy burden on my shoulders…..
This is exactly my problem too…and it leaves me all disturbed and bitter…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Glad to know you feel the same way too, even if it does not give a, well, pleasant feeling. Because there is that part of us that does not want to hurt other’s feelings even if to prove what’s true is the best thing we should do. Moreover, after each argument we lose our physical strength and felt guilty for engaging into one.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Absolutely true….
LikeLiked by 1 person